Inside Goals

Chapter 1

WHAT IS YOUR DESTINY?

Destiny is not a matter of chance; but a matter of choice. It is

not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.

—William Jennings Bryan

(Moncur and Quotationpage.com, 2009)

What is destiny? It can be defined in many ways. However, for the purposes of this book, I will use life purpose to describe destiny. Life purpose is defined as what you were created to do. Life purpose is your ultimate reason for existing. If someone or something exists, then it has a purpose. A TV was created to aid with mass communication and entertainment. Houses are built to provide shelter for people. People are created with a purpose as well.

During our teenage years of human development, a male or female may be exploring or are in search of their identity. As a teenager, your question may be why was I created? or what was I created to do? That is a very good question. This is a crucial time in your life. It is very important that you seriously begin to think about your purpose. When you graduate from high school, time is going to fl y fast. You are then going to wonder where all of the years have gone.

It is important for you to know that as you seriously search for your life’s purpose, it will be revealed to you. In order to get you thinking about your life purpose, let me ask you a question:

If you were to go to sleep and wake up having all of the money and resources you would need to accomplish something great and that you have a passion to do, what would that accomplishment be?

I ask this question to get you thinking about what you have a passion to do more than anything without the barrier of not having enough money or other resources. When you identify your life purpose, you will not have to search hard to find the resources because resources will find you. The resources most people need include man power, money, and other tangible items.

There are many people who have passed away without doing what made them happy in their lives. As a result, books and projects that could have changed people’s lives are in the graves. There are writers of great books in the graves as well as singers. There may be different reasons why people do not accomplish what they have dreamed of doing. I want to make sure that you are an exception, and that you live in what you’re created to do.

Many people may not have had the resources that are now available today. Others may have had personal or family reasons for not accomplishing their life’s purpose. Let me say now that you are responsible for the decisions you make and the actions you take. The decisions that you make today will affect what your tomorrow will look like.

Some people decide to make career changes or search for their life purpose later in life. These people have been on a job that they have dreaded for decades. You are supposed to enjoy life. Most of the days during the week will be spent working.

You might as well be doing something that you enjoy. A word of the wise is that you do not want to wait too long to search for your purpose. If you decide to wait, time will continue to pass. Once time has passed, you cannot get it back. It is best to search now while you are young and vibrant. The sky is the limit. You can accomplish anything you set your mind on doing.

I want to also forewarn you that so many times parents assign a purpose to their children’s lives. Parents may help you recognize what your talents are; however, they cannot tell you what you were created to do in life. Your father is not God neither is your mother. God, the Creator, is the one who gives us talents and knows what our purpose is.

Many times, parents may believe that they are helping young people out by telling you what you are supposed to be. These actions by parents can hurt young people in two ways: (1) it hinders you from being able to identify who you are for yourself, and (2) parents sometimes project their unachieved purpose on to you expecting you to carry out their purpose. Beware of this because it can cause you to have a broken relationship with you parents. It can also cause you to be depressed because you may feel that you have no control over your life. For these reasons, it is best for you to seek your own life purpose.

I’d like to take a moment and share with you how I found my life purpose. It is important to first mention that I was raised in a Christian family and maintain those beliefs today. I graduated from high school with the idea that I was going to go to law school and one day become a lawyer. I knew my gift involved helping and interacting with people. I then attended Pennsylvania State University and majored in political science.

During my journey to graduating from college, I took a psychology course and fell in love with the major. I decided to double major in psychology, which enabled me to graduate with a bachelor’s degree in both political science and psychology. I did take the LSAT one time and did not score high on it at all. I believe this was one sign that becoming a lawyer was not my life purpose. While I was in college, I joined a Christian greek organization named Alpha Nu Omega Inc. This caused my relationship with God to become closer.

After graduation, I moved back to New Jersey where I was born and raised. I spent many of my days sending my résumé to companies to obtain a job. I was also spending time praying and reading the Bible. Three or four months later, I received a strong desire to minister the Word of God. This was confirmed by two pastors in New Jersey. It was not long before then that I was ordained and licensed as a minister. I received a desire to counsel people and have a business doing so. Three years later, I joined with four women and my husband to establish Kingdom Expansion Enterprises Inc., a nonprofit organization that provides counseling, life coaching and mentoring and health services to people in Virginia. My goal is to one day be able to develop locations throughout the country and internationally as well (i.e., Africa). As you can see, having a relationship with God is a definite way of obtaining your life purpose.

We are talking about the importance of seeking your life purpose. Now a question you may have is, How long does it take until I find my life’s purpose? My answer is that it varies for each person. If you are diligent and persistent, you will find it.

Teenagers who live in supportive environments may find it easier and quicker to identify their purpose than those in other environments. A supportive environment allows for brainstorming and exploration of options. A supportive environment includes positive family, friends, and mentors. For those of you who do not have supportive environments, there is still hope for you. No matter what your situation is or how long it takes, never give up on your dreams. I will discuss the options available to you in part 5 of this book.

The time it takes for you to discover your life purpose may be different from your peers. It is important that while you are doing some soul searching that you also use your time wisely. The best activity to engage in while searching for your life purpose is perfecting your résumé for employment. It is best to be active and working rather than sitting around, waiting for your life purpose to drop out of the sky. While you are working, you may learn more about your likes and dislikes as well as your strengths and challenges. Gaining and maintaining employment will help you remain focus, establish employment stability as well as financial stability.

A third question that you may ask is, Why is this topic being discussed with goal setting? This topic is being brought up early to save you and your family time and money. Many students graduate from high school and go straight into college not knowing what they are to do with their lives. These same students may end up changing majors three and fours times, causing them to be in school for six years. Don’t get me wrong. One major may better suit another for the field you want to enter. This change is acceptable as long as it does not cause you to be in school longer than you should (four and a half years).

The journey of identifying who you are and your life purpose is supposed to be fun. Do not be worried. You are going to find it. Some of you may have an idea already of your life purpose. Be patient, open, and alert because you may obtain different hints as you pay closer attention to your thoughts, likes, and dislikes.